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So, I’m currently on the East Coast mainline staring out a rain swept window across miles of farmland. I do enjoy a good journey- time to myself to read, blog and think about the various idioms that come to me.

Home made sandwich- Check!
Wi-Fi so poor I can’t listen to Spotify- Check!
Surrounded by people confused by trains – Double Check!

This post is about the people on trains. I consider myself a train journeyman who keeps himself to himself, helps with the overhead storage if I’m sat on the aisle seat and generally respectful to others. A courtesy I think all humans should have but travelling in a cage seems to bring out the inner ‘melon’ of people.

Sitting across from me is a Woman breast feeding what appears to be a 2/3 year old. I appreciate it’s not illegal, it’s convenient and a necessary evil which I’m sure she is hating more than I am.
Still…I don’t want that on my train journey. I’m sure the baby changing or a hall way is more private and easier. As much as the lady opposite is trying to look natural, you can tell her A cups are causing distress to the entire train.

Behind me, two Leeds United fans talking about Cellino. I’m not really listening to the conversation but observing the number of slurps of Carlsberg they are taking and use of sloppy ‘Northern’ English- another pet peeve.
Drink, fine. Accent, fine. Being lounder than a jet plane in the quiet coach, not okay. This is a designated quiet coach, please move down the train and respect the roles- babies are present and people trying to work.

It’s also 1.30, easy on the ‘bevvies’.

It seems social etiquette doesn’t apply. I’m not sure why it’s disappeared and what makes trains so special but slowly but surely it’s pushing me towards a car.

I’m at a point where etiquette should be taught at public school every morning and detention for poor etiquette throughout the day.

On the flip side – I have a 4 person table to myself!

Anyway, a car- I look forward to posting about driving etiquette in the not so distant future!